Each individual is formed not only by their own inherent nature but also by actions of those around them and how they perceive and interpret those actions.
The individual's interpretation of these relationships, both conscious and unconscious, becomes the basis for later relations with others, in friendship, marriage, and raising a family. Research data has suggested that childhood trauma may be etiologically significant in well over half of BPD patients (Zanarini). Understanding and validating the patient's anger and manipulative behaviors, which create so many counter-transference problems for the therapist, can thus allow the therapist to reframe them as adaptive and understandable in light of early trauma (Gunderson and Chu). .
Internal Mental Structures: Objects.
In object relations theory, the word object is used with a very specific meaning. It's not literally a physical person, but an internal mental structure that is formed throughout early development. This mental structure is built through a series of experiences with significant others through a psychic process called introjection. Because an infant's earliest experiences are usually with its mother; she is usually the first internal object formed by the infant. Internal objects modify and are modified by life experience, from childhood through old age. As the social world and awareness of the infant expands, the father and other significant people also become internalized objects.
Splitting.
Introjection, the process of creating internal mental objects, when these internal mental objects are judged unacceptable, leads to another process called splitting. Splitting occurs because the infant cannot resolve the dissonance between certain feelings such as rage and longing, which occur in conjunction with the deep primal feelings of need that are a part of the normal relationship development. As a result, the infant has to split off parts of itself and repress them.