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Dionysus & Apollo

            I see many aspects of Apollo and Dionysus in my everyday life. I strive to be more Apollonian in behavior as to be more efficient and accomplish more in with the limited amount of time we are all presented with. I am compelled to make to-do lists and jot down schedules, however, the Dionysian part of my personality just doesn't feel like it. I do not feel I would get the sort of gratification I need to follow a schedule or complete listed tasks. Want and feel rule my behavior and are both predominantly Dionysian concepts when they have little to do with anything other than one's own comfort. I am aware of this problem and have every intention to modify it, but it almost seems as though I"d be betraying myself and my personality as a whole to do so. I rationalize it to myself by saying, "If I wanted something bad enough, I would expel the effort. If I"m not showing any enthusiasm, I just don't want it and therefore it will not happen.".
             The one exception is morality. I see strong connection to the Apollonian pre-occupation with morality and the importance it reserves in the Apollonian's life. I never liked extra-curricular activities in high school. Even attending them seemed extraneous, but when it came to community service, I didn't care who it was through or what specific type of outreach was involved, it was imperative that I participate. My highest moral as a person is the importance of helping others. It seems to go along with Apollonian though that it really is a survival mechanism and it loosely follows that logic.
            


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