One cannot blame negative circumstances or conditions on another. Behavior and decisions must be made with conscious choice and values rather than just feelings and condition. Covey illustrates this very well on page 78 where he compares reactive and proactive. One example of a reactive statement is; There is nothing I can do. The proactive statement of the same feeling would be; Let's look at our alternatives. The difference of proactive and reactive is just the way one looks at things. Instead of being close-minded, one has to be optimistic and try to solve problems rather than just settling for second best.
Covey's circle of concern and influence is another great way to demonstrate what being proactive really is. First, the Circle of Concern, which contains a wide range of concern from one physical health to nuclear holocaust. Next, one has to differentiate their concerns that they could do something about, and the ones that they cannot. This is where the Circle of Influence comes in. It is a smaller circle put inside of the original Circle of Concern. All of the concerns that one has control over goes inside the Circle of Influence, and comes out of the Circle of Concern. The goal for a proactive person is to stretch the Circle of Influence so that it takes up most of the original circle. Proactive people work on things that they could do something about rather than worrying about thing that they could do nothing about. Doing this will increase the Circle of Influence, and diminish the concerns. .
The second habit is, "Begin with the End in Mind."" Covey is very clear right from the start. He is describing a funeral, and when you reach the casket and look inside, the person is you. He then describes four people who go to the altar and speak about you: a family member, a friend, a person from work, and someone from a community organization where you were involved in.
