Society also suffers the legal and economic burden of arrest, prosecution and imprisonment of abusers and added danger to law enforcement personnel, and the social cost of crime.
People who are violent often witnessed or suffered abuse as children, violence is a learned behavior. Many abusers witnessed or suffered abuse earlier in life and as a result have a low self-esteem. People with a poor self-image may use violence to feel important. People who are violent may have untreated mental or emotional problems. Many crave power, some people see violence as a way to gain control over family members. Some abuse alcohol or other drugs, this is a common factor in violent households.
There are many reasons why victims of relationship abuse may stay in the relationship. Sometimes they feel that if they live the relationship they will be hurt by the abuser. Some victims feel that they did something wrong and the abuse is their own fault. Other times the victims have children and want to keep their families together. And sometimes victims have such deep feelings of love and loyalty for the abusers that they stay no matter how bad the situation.
People don't talk to others about their situation for many of the same reasons they stay in abusive relationships. In addition, sometimes victims don't know who to talk to or are too embarrassed to tell someone else. Young people may feel that they will not be believed or that telling their parents, friends, or teachers will make them look bad.
Both victims and abusers often feel powerless to change the situation. They often feel trapped by a lack of alternatives; a spouse or child may be dependent on an abuser. Elderly people and children may feel power less to escape, fear and shame, victims may feel helpless, guilty or worthless. They may feel ashamed of their troubled relationships and may not trust those who could help. Abusers may be afraid of being punished or losing their families if they seek help, isolation, victims often believe they have nowhere to return, so the abuse remains hidden.
