Before last year, I was suffering from a very serious condition. It wasn't a fatal condition or even medical condition but it was a mental condition, stage freight. Despite popular belief, I was absolutely petrified of the stage. I displayed excessive amounts of confidence in preparing myself for a performance, but the minutes before I walked on that stage I would freeze, forget everything, and inevitably become very ill. I wasn't always that way. When I was younger I would sing and dance for anyone who would watch. I was all about showing the world that I was one talented little kid. All that changed when I entered high school. My first year of high school I felt like a really little fish in an extremely large pond and that made me doubt myself. Everyone around me was older and way more talented. I thought about just giving up my dream of performing, but the fire inside me, even though it was substantially smaller, was still burning, so I decided to stick with it. .
My first few years in high school I mostly sang in a group. The thought of singing a solo was still a little to intimidating for me to handle. When junior came around I knew that I had to get over my fear or I would never be able to handle auditions or anything. So that year I decided that I had to do it, I had to get on that stage and prove to myself and the world that I wasn't all talk, I wanted to prove that I could sing and sing well. I decided to audition for a solo spot in the big show choir show that was held in May. My audition was shaky but I was giving the spot. I was going to go through with it.
The day came and I was fully prepared. I kept telling myself that I could do it and that nobody would "Boo" me off the stage. When the act before me was performing I was feeling like I needed to run far away. But I kept thinking about how much I wanted my dream of Broadway to come true and that if I couldn't perform in front of this high school auditorium audience then I certainly cannot perform in front of a packed house at the Cadillac Palace.
