Sometimes people are unable to control the direction their life takes. Throughout the day people experience many events that can change a person's outlook on life completely. No matter how hard they try, or if they are unwilling to accept these changes there is little they can do to prevent them. Change can reshape a person mentally and physically causing them to alter the course of their lives. .
In May 1999 when my mom was fighting for her life, I fell into a depressed state and changed my focus to going out a lot to avoid my problems at home. On one of these occasions this lifestyle led to the accident that changed me forever. I do not remember anything until I heard nurses asking me questions at the hospital. I found out that I had been in a serious car crash and would be at the hospital for a while receiving treatment. My lungs had been punctured causing air to go around my heart, I had minor internal bleeding, and my left arm was paralyzed. Even though I was told I needed to fight to get better, my only focus was on my disbelief of what had happened and why had it happened to me. Most of the memories from when I was in the hospital have been lost, much like that entire summer however; I do recall feeling how lucky I was to be alive. I also knew I should have been thankful and yet, I found it hard to feel gratitude as a part of me wished I had not survived. .
I had just graduated and was planning on going to college before the accident halted my life so abruptly. My future was uncertain as I came to realize that I had also suffered a minor brain injury and had some cognitive difficulties. I could not remember small things like where I had put a cup down, or even if I had put it down. Before the accident I was working as a waitress but found myself unemployed since I could not use my left arm due to the chronic pain. I should have been at the point in my life where I was pursuing opportunities to open up my life instead of my life being put on hold for months as I learned the stages of life all over again.
