We were sitting around one day, bored as an old man watching paint dry, we all needed some excitement, something to stimulate our minds and bodies, so we all decided to take a trip to a strip club in Canada.
We piled into the car like a bunch of sailors on shore leave. We were as excited as a five year old boy during his first Christmas. We raced up the interstate like fireman on their way to a fire. If we went any faster I swear the paint would have peeled off the car. It was dark and snowy, so it felt like we were on a speed boat out in the ocean racing for shore, but we just kept driving because we knew that we were heading for more fun playing a board game of chutes and ladders!.
The border guards can be tough as a nail, so as we approached the border our excitement was replaced with nervous. We felt like a bunch of brides on their wedding day as we waited in line to have our I.D.S checked. The tension was so thick you couldn't even cut it with a knife. We were all doing our best to hide our anxiety by putting on smiles as big as a slice of watermelon! They probably could hear inside the car because our hearts were pounding like drums and our knees knocking sounded like someone playing bongos!.
One Border Guard was skinny as a Popsicle stick with hair as greasy as a Mc Donald's big Mac, and the other one was so fat he had chins on his chins! His uniform was so tight it looked like a balloon that was about to bust! They looked like Laurel and Hardy standing there waiting to check our I.D.S and they both were so serious their faces looked like they were made out of stone!.
Our hearts dropped into our stomachs, like stones falling into a bottomless pit. When it was our turn we crept up to the checkpoint like a stone rolling uphill. We tried to look like innocent school girls who's going to church, but we were all surprised when Abbott and Costello said "Bonjour" and waved us through without any problems.
