Official 2004 Presidential Endorsement .
I think I've finally decided who will get my vote in November.
Actually, his full name is "Fuck you, you're all a bunch of pussies who won't stop doing your damnedest to turn this country into a complete tyranny just to kill time while you let terrorists get organized enough to blow it the fuck up," repeated as many times as the voting machine will allow me to type. The goal will be to find out what the character limit is for a write-in candidate. Assuming that such a limit exists, I will make sure to report it back to you on this website. .
The fulfillment system for the company I work for has a limit of 35 characters on each of its customer address line fields. Unfortunately, only 30 characters actually print out on the shipping labels. Therefore, if you find a way to submit a fraudulent credit card order to us, you better not have an address of "The little red house with the white shutters, Nigeria" because there's at least a fifty-fifty chance that your next door neighbor with the blue shutters is going to get the package. But I digress. .
Here's an idea. If there's a really long character limit, instead of voting for "Fuck You", how about voting for this guy: .
"I run a prostitution ring out of my home at 157 Broad Ave., Palisades Park, New Jersey. Every weekend, I have a coke party and hold an open house for teenage girls who are thinking about dropping out of junior high, during which I personally have sex with each one of them. Sort of as a job interview. Then we pledge our allegiance to the planet Saturn and rehearse our plans for our murder-suicide pact, which we're determined to pull off in our Marilyn Monroe and James Dean costumes right smack in the middle of the Oval Office. That is, assuming this message spreads throughout the proper channels via these voting machines just like our secret contact in the US military keeps promising us it will.
Electronic voting would make voting much easier. ... There would be no interpretation with electronic voting. ... Electronic voting could even go on-line. ... There are just too many problems with punch ballots. Human error is very common when it comes to counting ballots as well as when it comes to actually voting on a ballot. ...
Today, elections in the United States usually involve the recruitment of poll workers and volunteers on Election Days to run ballot stations and count the ballots once the polls close. Many counties in California use expensive electronic voting machines which requires periodic software updates and maintenance which cost both time and money. ... Electronic voting machines and vote-by-mail have vulnerabilities of their own, however, and for some voters, the benefits of online voting may already outweigh the risks. The military faces and citizens overseas faces issues with paper ballots since th...
Another detrimental effect of turnout out is a long ballot. Too many elected offices at the local and state levels make the ballot long. ... Other states have experimented with ballot by mail. ... This has led to an increased reliance on the electronic medium and mass mailings as a means of reaching the voters. ... As the cost of the electronic medium has greatly increased, more candidates rely on the Internet. ...
Another detrimental effect of turnout out is a long ballot. Too many elected offices at the local and state levels make the ballot long. ... Other states have experimented with ballot by mail. ... This has led to an increased reliance on the electronic medium and mass mailings as a means of reaching the voters. ... As the cost of the electronic medium has greatly increased, more candidates rely on the Internet. ...
In the article, "The Future of Democracy," the author discusses electronic voting and direct democracy. ... But, that's the only advantage to electronic voting. ... Another requirement is that one must be able to read a ballot. As was not the case this year in Florida, a batch of senior citizens claimed to have been disenfranchised when they failed to read ballots correctly. ...
First, while electronic communications extended the voice of the zapatistas across Mexico and the world, Mexican security forces successfully contained the guerrilla presence to a small, confined area of the state of Chiapas. ... Finally, electoral reform permits the middle classes to vent their frustration via the ballot box. ...
Electronic Vote What Is good For? ... The researchers fear that problems with software systems will result in hacking and voter fraud, allowing people to cast extra votes and poll workers to alter ballots undetected. ... In past 200 years citizens are giving votes in paper ballots and nothing happened. ...
