1. Architectural Precedents
Mrs. Ramsay, however, can invest a but with something approaching certainty only if it involves personal human will; nature occupies for her a realm of supposition, not fact. (p.117) .
Mrs. Ramsay leaves the door open for what's possible. For her nothing is irrevocable. The aspirations of her children are dependent upon her. As the mother she provides balance by offsetting the fathers severe rationality and grim world-view. She entertains her children's dreams; she lets them play. She strives for wholeness, and connection with her children. Mrs. Ramsay is resistant to the thought of her children growing up, she wants them to remain tied to her, she needs to go on mothering, and she is aware that maturity is looming with all its possible unhappiness and misfortune. Woolf allows us into Mrs. Ramsay's thoughts:.
Oh, but she never wanted James to grow a day older! or Cam either. These two she would have liked to keep for ever just as they were, demons of wickedness, angels of delight, never to see them grow up into long-legged monsters. Nothing made up for the loss Why, she asked, pressing her chin on James's head, should they grow up so fast? Why should they go to school? She would have liked always to have had a baby. She was happiest carrying one in her arms touching his hair with her lips, she thought, he will never be so happy again, but stopped herself, remembering how it angered her husband that she should say that. Still, it was true. They were happier now than they would ever be again. (Lighthouse pp.58-59).
Mrs. Ramsay wants to go on protecting her children; she wants to forestall any separation. She is trying to preserve the unity of mother and child; she does not want the umbilical cord cut. She also wants to maintain the unity of the family; she wants them to remain connected, children being a strong, somewhat compulsory, unifying element for husband and wife. She doesn't want them to grow up into "long-legged monsters:- she regards adults as monsters, or maybe she sees growth as distorting her child.