I remember growing up, I was always surrounded by cousins, aunts, uncles, grandparents. Every time we got together it was a party. I remember many times I couldn't have both my parents together at a party because someone had to keep an eye on the restaurant we owned in our home town. Working so many hours and different shifts didn't turn out so good for our family. My parents got divorced. After the divorce so much happened, and from there on, everything changed, it had a huge effect in my life. I can identify the outcome of this stage of my life with Erikson's stage three (3) Learning Initiative versus Guilt (Purpose). I started getting aggressive at times, I felt guilt of the situation even though it wasn't my fault. I was fearful and depended completely on my mother for safety.
When my parents got divorced, the first thing that came to my mind was, why is this happening to my family? If you'd met my parents at the time you would never think that there was something wrong happening between them. We were the happiest family you can imagine, we always went on family trips, we used to have people over for dinner very often. They really seemed to me like a happy couple. I was eight years old when my parents got divorced, my brother was 16. I didn't really understand what was happening at the time, I just remember my mother crying all day and that made me sad, so I cried with her. She tried to explain it to me, but all I wanted to hear was that my father wasn't leaving us. The divorce had a huge affect on my life. I started to concentrate less in school, had bad grades, and didn't want to play with my friends. My reaction to it was shutting out so my parents decided to send me to therapy, to talk with someone other than a family member. According to Erikson's Stage four (4) Industry Versus Inferiority (Competence), describes how the mistrusted child will doubt the future. The shame and guilt child will experience defeat and inferiority.
