Actually, it has been such a long week. I have been so stressed out about anything from papers, to tests. My head feels as if it is caught between two blocks of metal, desperately trying to get to one another. There is so much pressure. The muscles of my neck and back are in tight little balls I can feel when I try to relieve my pain by gently massaging them. I finally have a few minutes to myself. I think I"ll get in the hot tub. I put on my bathing suit and walk over to the area that the hot tub is placed in. .
I open the door. I stand there, in anticipation, smelling all the chemicals used to keep a hot tub maintained. I close my eyes and I focus on just the smells. I breathe in the musty smell an area such as this one can aquire when used often without ventilation. I also can sense the familiar scents of chlorine and bromine. It almost hurts my nose. It reminds me of days spent at the pool on vacations when I was younger. I remember the day I learned how to swim. I had been so afraid of the water before that day. Finally, I had decided I wasn't going to miss out on any more fun. I jumped in the water and swam to where everyone else is. I ponder on that day for a few seconds, taking myself out of reality. My gray cat, Annie, leaps off the hot tub, causing a few of the chemicals that have recently been used to fall onto the floor making a loud crash. I am immediately taken back into reality as I open my eyes.
I walk into the hot tub area. There is a large standard cabinet made of a lightly colored wood that reaches from the floor to the ceiling. This is to my left. It is about as long as the wall it sits against. The cabinet is a storage place for numerous items. The left side is so full of tools, they almost fall on top of you when you open the doors. On the right side of the cabinet there are towels on the bottom two shelves. On the top two shelves are other various items. There are cleaning supplies, hot tub chemicals, and silly little gadgets my dad won't throw away because he thinks he can use them someday.
Fortunately, I stayed out of trouble most of the time. ... My girlfriend gives me a hard time about this. ... It's terrible that I think of myself this way. ... d rather seek acceptance from myself than from others. ... There is always a time and place for speaking. ...
In this sense, Gina also helped me reconsider the way I viewed myself. Before I met her, I had always looked at myself too seriously and too critically. ... Gina taught me how to relax, how to look at myself with a smile, and be able to joke about my own weaknesses in order to feel comfortable with myself and achieve inner-peace. I understood that before I could respect anybody else, I needed to respect myself and be content with my personality. ... I realized that I need to enjoy every moment of my life and spend as much time as possible with the people who I love; that I should not forget t...
I used to look forward to this every week because we had so much fun together and although I was no pro skier it was always a great time. ... I always wanted just once to go with everyone down the tougher slope but I could never bring myself to do it. ... Just like Jerry "plunged down [into the water] again" (Lessing 178) I continued Saturday after Saturday I attempted to ski the moguls and time after time I took spills or fell. ... They were talking but all I did was set in my mind that this time was going to be "IT," I was going to make it down the slope. ... Skiing down moguls and swimming ...
It seems like it comes naturally almost 90% of the time because I was brought up that way. ... I never asked myself if there was difference. ... As I asked myself, I found that I believe that there are two extremely different bodies. ... I would not have taken time for myself to evaluate the way I think of Him. ... I also found supporting answers to what I believe such as, why I believe in God and why do I do the right thing most of the time. ...
I noticed he switched helmets every time he became a new team. ... This made me realize I was staring at a six- year- old version of myself. ... He did not know how to swim at the time, and he said he told the parents and his friend this information. ... I then realized why I enjoyed playing by myself so much. ... I realized why I liked playing by myself at that age so much. ...
I thought to myself, "I"m not going to have the baby today. ... This time it would not go away. ... I was scared myself. ... Now as the time was here, I wanted it all to go away. ... "I have so many clothes that I should give away," I thought to myself. ...
I would consider myself a very lucky girl. I had a mother who stayed home and raised George and myself until I was seventeen, and a father who worked his tail off so she could do so. ... Unlike most other things, my beliefs do not take work, but rather it does require time. ... I decided to stay at home and work full time, and take classes at College of DuPage full time as well. ... Discrimination will be here until the end of time. ...
I felt so out of place, I felt like I was lying to myself and everyone around for even being in that room. What they were teaching I couldn't bring myself to believe in. ... After that time I never said anything again. ... It took me a long time to figure out how I felt and I wasn't going to hide to make people feel better. ...
Jane seems very morbid for her age, as she thinks about death and even considers starving herself, " never eating more, and letting myself die." ... said my reason- Jane's thoughts of suicide in Chapter 2 are rebellious against Christianity, the religion she has been raised into, because, as she identifies, suicide is considered a sin, "what thought had I been but just conceiving of starving myself to death? ... Of course, since the story is being told by an adult Jane Eyre, it is possible that the intelligent thoughts have been developed in retrospect, but some of them do appear to have...
