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Women, Sexuality and Emotion


            In Leslie Bells informative piece "Hard to Get: Twenty-Something Women and the Paradox of Sexual Freedom," she explores the sexuality of multiple women with diverse backgrounds in order to determine how sexuality affects women and emotionally. Bell performed interviews with various women which allowed her to develop three different distinct categories in which she categorized the women as the "Sexual Woman, the Relational Woman, and the desiring Woman" (Bell 29), each having their own attributes that the other categories lack. These diverse types of women all fell into the category fitted because of how society prefers women to behave and how the woman feels about society's/family's expectations for them. The result is a battle of how females feel about their history versus how they allow society to view them. In order for a woman to have a fulfilling life she must possess both a personal history and identity she is satisfied with not one or the other.
             A relationship between personal history and identity definitely exists. Piece within oneself derives from satisfaction with one's own personal history and identity. The result from dissatisfaction with both or one of these elements causes mental distress and a sense of being lost in life. Jayanthi, an American Indian woman from Bells interviews recalls "[getting] confused [and] freak[ing] out and feel[ing] [the need] to settle down" (33) when her actions opposed her parents and community's expectations of her. This caused an external conflict, an identity conflict. A usual saying is that one should not care what others think but Jayanthi's behavior jeopardized her good-girl appearance. The risk of tarnishing her identity made her feel distressed. Identity is the image society gives someone based on what is observed and not by the individual's unknown past. According to Bells research, a good social identity is a crucial part to a woman's success.


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