I was born in 1989 and, at that time, my father was 32. My parents had only one child as a boy, so they always wanted to have a girl. Especially my dad was happy about he finally got a girl. When I was growing up as a toddler and in early childhood, my father was always busy. He had just changed to another job so, he had to work really hard. He was achieving his career successfully, however not in good relationship with me. The biggest problem was he gave all the responsibility for rearing children to my mother, so he did not know anything about how to take care of baby or handle the child development. For example, my father ignored me all the time when I was toddler because I cried so much. Now, I can understand him, it was because of so much stress from his work, as a natural procedure of early adulthood. However, with my personal background, this affected pretty much on the relationship with my father. I feel more comfortable with my mom rather than my father, as like Harlow's experiment. When I started to go school and began to learn as a student, my father was really happy about he could teach me. We went to science fair and did some experiments together. Through that, I believe, I developed a sense of industry. He could spend more time with me compare to the past, and we had really good time. He always encouraged me to guess and do something on my own and if not, he helped me. .
From middle school years, however, everything changed. I knew that his parenting style was authoritatian parenting style. Except studying, he was always regulated me in his rule and forced me to follow that. I always wanted to develop my peer relationship, but my father did not allow me to do. So, I always could not fulfill my desire for that need. He not only spanked but also hit me from time to time because of this conflicts. This brought me serious results of unhappy mood and anxious about comparing myself with others.
