When I was around 18, I began trying to understand how the world really functioned. From what I could tell there was a lot of chaos in the world, but it was also filled with order. I thought that if I found a way to control or understand that order, life would be much simpler. It would be like having a how-to manual for almost any situation that presented itself. I later came to the eye-opening realization that my approach my was too idealistic, and that things are more dualistic and holistic in nature.
I looked for my perfect answer; the ideal manner in which to go about life for the better part of a year. Although at the time I rarely found true answers, the possibility of finding some piece of knowledge that could help me make sense of all the chaos kept me going. After all, I thought, how was it possible that I could see so much progress in the world and that so much was overcome, if not with some superior form of knowledge. As the overwhelming negativity of perceiving the world in this way got the better of me, I realized that idealism was a dream, and it was how some dreams tend to be, impossible. Just like that it hit me - things could not be constrained to one's perfect ideals, and especially, how subjective to the observer those ideals could be.
As time passed I kept noticing how most things in life come in pairs, and that there was a dualistic nature to most things in the world. From things as simple a light and shadows, to complex things like happiness and fear. Everywhere I looked, I started to spot this subtle existence of two's in the world. I do not mean that things should be looked at in terms of black and white, I mean I began to see the basis of things and that the grey areas where only meeting points of these opposing sides. This duality greatly changed my outlook on most things. Instead of focusing on the negative I began to see both sides of the equation, so to speak.