Over the past eight weeks, I have been attending regular "play sessions" on the playground of Woodward Elementary School. During this period of time, I became particularly aware of the rules and boundaries, set by adults and peers alike, that the children often encounter when attempting to frame their interactions in an acceptable way. To simply walk up to a group of children and ask them to play in a friendly manner represents only a minuscule factor of social development. As a child interacts, he or she must learn to interpret a wide variety of complex cues and requirements. Problems arise when separate requirements conflict with one another or with the child's own perceived needs and, at times, it is difficult for the child to understand that these requirements even exist!.
The internalization of formal rules is one facet of social development to which adults assign great significance. Indeed, noncompliance is the "most frequent reason for psychiatric referral of young children" (Schaffer, 1999, p. 250). Self-control is important, of course. "Adults play a crucial part in helping children to achieve control over their own behavior; it is only through initial dependence on others that a child can develop autonomy" (Schaffer, 1999, p. 249). What many adults tend to overlook, however, is that children are sometimes trying to operate within several different "realities," each of which sets forth an entirely different set of rules. For example, Turiel (cited in Schaffer, 1996, p. 268) notes that the requirements set forth by the family differ significantly from the requirements set forth in the "outside world." Similarly, the objectives of the adults on the playground are very different from the objectives of one's cohorts, and the child must find a way to interact that satisfies the rules delineated by both groups if he is to function successfully.
