There was a time when negotiating with your children involved little more than harsh punishment. Little Johnny would ask "why?" and the response was similar to "because I said so". If Little Johnny rebutteled into "that's not fair", he was likely to find out just how unfair life can really be. Without thinking twice, his father had probably already walked away to get his belt or simply reached across the table to give him a quick slap across the mouth. Little Johnny would suck back the tears while hiding behind his mother's skirt and the negotiation would be complete.
Today brings a different view to the subject. Parenting skills are no longer measured in terms of immediate success (i.e. did Little Johnny do what he was told when he was told to do it). Rather, they are measured by how well they guide your child into becoming a well-rounded person prepared for the big, bold world that lay ahead. The goal of parent-child negotiation has become one of long-term value deeply rooted in ethics and productive behaviors. It means "teaching", not "dictating". .
In addition, this new and improved view of parent-child negotiation means developing ourselves as parents. Just because you are the parent does not mean that you are always right. Being a parent entails constant development and awareness of yourself and the situations surrounding your children. Like any negotiation, it involves probing and listening in order to understand the issues, positions, and, most importantly, the interests.
How and why do misbehaviors develop?.
It is a fairly well known fact that all children misbehave in various ways through their entire childhood. While misbehaviors can be difficult to deal with as a parent (and just downright annoying), they are a normal part of the developmental process for any child. Our response to these unavoidable situations is what teaches our children how to view themselves and their interactions with the rest of the world.
