They are viewed as what is called a Narcissistic Supply. They are either overvalued and a means to flaunt accomplishments, or they are viewed as a vexation and treated as an emotional punching bag. A narcissistic parent does not seek the love and approval of their children as they are able to love themselves enough. The children are simply an object to manipulate or to own.
The main issues with this particular form of abuse are that the emotional scars are hard to recognize and persist often for a lifetime, and that the children of the narcissistic parent one day beget their own children and often repeat the damaging cycle. This is the very challenging dilemma of being the child of a narcissist, as so much of the abuse hinders progress in many ways later in life (McBride, 2009).
Usually, when a child raised in this situation does begin their own family, there is a three step process that can occur, depending on the nature of their upbringing as a Scapegoat or Golden Child. In the first stage, many of the ˜Golden Children' or ˜Scapegoat children' will see their own children as competition for the love and admiration of a spouse or parent of their own. Their offspring intrude upon their territory and as a result are belittled or humiliated to the best of the ˜new narcissist's' advantage. This is meant to put the offspring in their place, or gain a certain reaction. If the reaction received is not the desired one, the new narcissist will often resort to emotional absence or detachment. This is because the anger and hostility that was meant to manipulate the situation failed. However, it is hardly the only trick a narcissist harbors up their sleeve.
The child of a narcissistic child is subconsciously viewed as an enemy as they are in competition for Narcissistic Supply. Where the expressions of cruelty or open hostility are not impossible, a narcissist will separate emotionally and physically in another brutal form of punishment.
