Growing up in an Italian household was interesting to say the least. By nature, Italians are loud, boisterous people and my family fits right in with the stereotype. Standing at 5'0, my mother is the loudest person in the room. With a sweet personality, she was also never afraid to show who runs house. She has a combination of letting you know that she will always be there for you but you better stay in line. This is a healthy balance of love and discipline and I will use this parenting strategy when I grow up. In the book The Color of Water, James's mother Ruth uses a blend of authoritarian and uninvolved parenting styles to raise her children. Unlike my mother, Ruth didn't have a healthy balance between love and discipline towards her children.
Ruth made what seemed to be a bold stand in her life when she chose to marry. As a white Jewish woman, it was expected of her to marry a white Jewish man. Instead, Ruth decided to follow her heart and marry a country black man. During this time, this was something completely unheard of and because of it, Ruth's family disowned her. Because everyone she came close too disowned her, she developed a rugged exterior. She didn't want the family she raised to see black and white like the family she grew up in did. She wanted them to see love and that's it. This caused problems though. James knew that his mom looked different then him and that all of his siblings were mixed colors. When he became curious and asked questions, Ruth wouldn't respond to him. the times that she did respond, she was very short with him.
"So you're my real mother?.
"Of course I am. ".
"Then who's my grandparents? ".
"My mother died many, many years ago, " she said. My father, he was a fox. No more questions tonight. You want some coffee cake?"" (McBride 24-25).
This relates to uninvolved parenting as she is being detached from her children. She is purposefully distancing herself from conversation with her children so she doesn't have to bring up her past.