The tears ran down my face as I promised her that I would come and listen to her play.
Everything seemed to be silenced as I walked toward the elevators. Some people smiled at me as we walked past each other, and I remember wanting to scream at them, "Can't you see my heart is being ripped out? "My sister just died! " I got on the elevator as a family was getting off with their newborn baby. They looked so happy. I wondered if they could see the pain in my eyes.
The elevator started going up and I wished it would just keep going. Maybe it would take me to heaven and I could be with her there instead of being here in this dark, sad, depressing hospital. When the elevator doors opened the sense of silence is broken, I hear my mom and sisters crying and screaming. I had never heard anything like that before. It was the sound of overwhelming sadness, as if the world was ending. .
Walking past the nurse's station I could see the look of sympathy in the nurse's eyes. One of them came over to me and led me over to where my family was. My sister sally ran to me and just about fell into my arms crying. Her whole body was trembling. She had been in the room with Tina when she took her last breath. I held her and hugged her. I told her everything was going to be ok. It felt as if we stood there for an eternity crying, holding each other, and telling one another how much we love each other.
The hospital room was so dark and gloomy looking. Reality hit me at that point, it felt like the room was spinning in circles. With every spin my life with my big sister passed by in fast motion. There my sister lay, it looked as if she was just sleeping. She didn't look like herself, her face was swollen and she had no hair, due to the radiation treatments. My mom came over to me and gave me a hug. She had never hugged me like that before, and I could feel her pain. It was as if I was tammy and she was giving me a hug and saying good bye.
