Therefore the aspect of power actually dictates the extent of violence in the family. It has also been noted that some men start getting violent against their wives when they realize that their wives are beginning to become more independent and assertive. It is the perceived lack or loss of power that usually drives partners to become violent against their spouses. Sometimes husbands cut off their wives from any form of financial assistance and they also cut off their wives' channels of communication with their friends or family members because they want to control them fully. Cases of verbal abuse are also common between spouses as they are constantly seeking to put each other down.
In some families, siblings may show violence to each other. It has been found that violence between siblings has become more common than child or spouse abuse because many people assume that it is normal for it to exist but they forget it can get very serious. Family members usually consider abusive acts between siblings as not being abusive. Sibling incest has also become more common than parent- child incest, an indication that very little is being done about it. For instance, a man may be the first born in a family with younger siblings who look up to him. This may make him feel responsible for decision making, giving advice or mentorship. .
Over time, the young siblings become mature and start making their own decisions. They might even do it better than their firstborn brother. This might make the first born jealous so that he becomes bitter and violent against his own siblings. Often, he will resort to violence as a way of expressing himself, not realizing that venting anger against his own siblings will not help him gain the control he once assumed. One reason for the rising cases of sibling violence is because it is confused with sibling rivalry which parents and the society at large considers very normal (Mallee, 2002).
