It shows how Toula along with Ian try to maintain the ethnic traditions which provide continuity and strength to her family. It shows that if people really love each other they can absorb the differences between cultures and obtain and benefit from the positive aspects of both.
It is in the Greek family, as in the Ukrainian family where the mother controls the household, it is she who decides who does what and sets the parameters for the children. She does this whilst juggling her children's feelings and well being along with her husband's feelings and the role he has within the family. As Toula's mother says: .
'The man is the head but the woman is the neck and she can turn the head any way she wants.'.
Of course, all Toula's father wants is for Toula to be happy but he believes it can only be with somebody from his own culture, he feels threatened that his authority is being undermined, that he doesn't have control over his children - as Papa says:.
'Is he a nice boy? Is he from a good family? I don't know. I don't know. Nobody comes to talk to me anymore.'.
The bigheartedness of Toula's family is overwhelming compared to Ian's rather conservative, stuffy middle class upbringing. At the Easter celebrations where ALL of Toula's family descends upon the family restaurant Ian is given his debut. The food and wine is flowing but when it is found out that he is a vegetarian a deadly hush descends upon the proceedings however, one of Toula's Aunts announces:.
'You don't eat meat? That's OK. I'll make lamb!'.
and completes the statement by an over-the-top clasping and pinching of his face with her well jewelled hands. Within this flurry of dramatics the festivities get back on track. .
So true love wins through, the big day arrives. The house is taken over by the women, there are curlers, nail varnishes, lipsticks, tights, hairdryers, and bleaching of women's moustaches going on in full earnest.