Why can't I relate to my child? Am I a good parent? What effect do I have on my child? Many people wonder about how to be a good parent. Parents are well trained to be lawyers, doctors, chefs, architects, and teachers, but fail to notice the most important, long-lasting job of all--parenting. Many dilemmas occur during the parenting process, but what counts most of all is a parents' overall style in parenting a child. It's the overall pattern of interactions that shapes a child's development and behavior. There are a variety of ways to interact with a child; some styles seem to work better than others. It is essential to use the correct styles of parenting, because a parent's choice shapes a child's chance. The end product of a child depends on the teaching techniques or styles of a parent. There are two styles of parenting that hold common weaknesses. The two styles that bring out the negativity of a child is permissive and authoritarian parenting.
Paul, age 9, is playing with Timothy; he gets on Timothy's scooter without permission and begins to ride away. A permissive parent would typically believe that Paul should be able to convey his desire freely, and does not use the opportunity to help him solve the problem. Permissive parents are warm and accepting, but have the propensity to avoid overpowering a child's creativity. They make fewer demands on mature behavior, and generally have difficulties in controlling their child's impulses. They are likely to being reluctant in accepting responsibilities. Although the permissiveness of a parent allows a child to openly express his/her creativity, it can also be defective when a parent becomes too passive and, for that reason, lacks insight or opinion in a child's life. Parents then become less of an authority figure in a child's life, making less impact. Lastly, a permissive parent may lead into a friend-to-friend relationship, rather than a parent-child relationship.