Relationships are the hardest thing we will ever do. And each time we partner and get involved in a relationship we take a chance. There is always that risk that we could get hurt. But remember, anything worth doing is worth doing well. Love can only fill up a heart that is open. It can't get through one that has armor around it. So if you're going to be in a relationship, then be in the relationship completely and allow yourself to be vulnerable.
There is a price to that vulnerability. Sometimes you can get wounded. As the song says, "Breaking up is hard to do." It certainly is. Only morons, narcissists and sociopaths don't feel bad when it's over.
And once a heart is wounded, it takes time for it to heal. But it will heal if you allow it to. Of course you'll go through the loss which is real, you'll experience missing the other person, the grieving of what was, the grieving and perhaps anger of what wasn't but what you wish could have been, and of course you'll feel hurt. When a relationship ends there is sadness. Relationships and the end of them are a breeding ground for all kinds of emotions.
The important thing is to feel them, to really experience all those emotions, and then get on with your life. Pining away for what isn't and what won't be, and probably really never was, doesn't serve you. It just keeps you stuck where you are. .
If you are pining away for someone or even some thing, get over it. Instead of crying and carrying on because it's over, smile because it happened. Besides, your life is waiting.
So if you're pining for the "one that got away" or for "the great relationship that never was", stop feeling sorry for yourself. Your life is waiting to happen. Help your life along. As Edmund Burke once said, "You cannot plan the future by the past." So in order to have a different future, you have to stop living in the past. I will say it again, "Get over it and get on with living.".
It's not always up to us when a relationship comes to an end.