In the essay, "Can We Love Our Battering Fathers?- Helen H. Gordon, the author, creates a vivid image of hopelessness in the family. The father is the main cause of fear which is shown through his behavior towards the mother and his children. The mother suffers the most tortures both physically and psychologically. The daughter becomes uncertain; she can neither love nor hate her father. The repetitive misery becomes so tense that it shatters the whole family apart leading to uncertainty.
Exploring the role that the father plays as batterer holds important significance for the members of the family who live with the abuse. The father is a harsh and violent husband, the reason for being so is that he is "Powerless to avenge himself against his childhood oppressor, he took revenge on her surrogate "his wife."" (9). The reason for the violence towards the mother was basically that he wanted to dominate and control his wife and children. This way of thinking made the use of violence acceptable to the father. The father's anger and violence is also shown through direct speech. When he breaks his wife's favorite vase he automatically blames it on her "What the hell d'ja put that thing there for?-(7). This also sets the atmosphere of the essay and makes one hear what the father's tone is, which obviously is cruel. The father is also an alcoholic, which unleashes his feelings, fears, and rage. Battering is a never ending task towards the mother for instance "One night we were again awakened by screams. We watched in terror as Dad pushed Mother down two flights of stairs- (8), this explicitly indicates how drinking alcohol enrages the father. The father was also abusive towards the children. The father "(favored a belt for whipping because it wouldn't break bones)-(7), which signifies that the children live in fear of violent temper. The children find ways to cope with this and accept the battering because in their minds it helps them become better persons.