In the essay "Once More to the Lake," E. White struggles with his sense of reality when he vacations with his son on the same lake where he and his family used to spend their summers. White's account is that of a man who cannot seem to fully grasp his own identity. By being in a setting where he had spent so much time as a child, his mind is continuously flooded with memories of his childhood and he finds that his sense of time is also often distorted.
As a child, White and his family vacationed summer after summer on the same lake in Maine. These summer retreats gave White many experiences and produced vivid memories that remained prevalent in his mind. The lake left such a strong impression on White that one day, his desire to go back grew so strong that it led him and his son to the very spot on the lake that he used to frequent with his family. When he arrived, the memories of his childhood summers came flooding back. "It is strange how much you can remember about places like that once you allow your mind to return into the grooves which lead back" (53), he says. .
Little had changed since his last visit to the lake decades ago. He recounts his memories of that special place as if it had only been days - not years since he had last been there. The smells were the same, the people had not changed, and even the lake was .
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"the same number of inches from the dock" (55) as it had been when he swam there as a child. He and his son proceeded to do many of the activities that he and his own father had once done, but in doing so, an eerie feeling continually crept up on him. He kept envisioning that he was his father and his son was in fact, him. There are many instances where this occurs. The most powerful is at the end of the essay when White's son puts on a wet bathing suit and White winces as his own "groin felt the chill of death" (57).
Throughout the essay, White struggles to find his own identity which he repeatedly confuses with that of his son.