When we grow up, we go through changes and there are hard times that we deal with. Most kids can put up with hard times and deal with them in healthy ways. I was not one of these kids. The day was May 16, 1999 it was a Wednesday and it would be a day I"d remember for the rest of my life. I have been diagnosed with severe depression since I was a freshman and it hasn't improved since then, in fact, if anything, it's gotten worse. This Wednesday was probably the lowest day of all, so far. .
The day started out bad to begin with, because I"d completely forgotten about a big paper due in history class and I knew that the teacher would take off a lot of points if it were late. So I was already in a bad mood after first period, but this wasn't the end of my misery. The next few periods would bring forgotten homework due, my friends not talking to me, and my girlfriend, Heather, ignoring me and walking away. I was so sick of everything already that I couldn't even deal with rest of the day, so I called my mom and left school. .
I went home and slept for the next few hours. People with depression tend to want to sleep a lot; maybe that's why I sleep in class. Then I woke up about 10 minutes before 3 o"clock and I waited for Heather to call me like she always did after school. She didn't call me until close to 7 o"clock that night.
"Hello?" I answered. "Hi, honey, how are you?" she replied in a hasty sounding voice. .
"Pretty shitty can you come over so we can talk for a while?" I almost begged of her. .
"Well we are about to eat dinner then I wanted to go online and talk to some friends and stuff. Is that ok?" She asked very uncaringly. .
"Yeah, fine whatever, bye!" I then slammed the phone down in anger and despair.
I had already been sitting in my room cutting myself for the last few hours. Cutting myself wasn't a healthy way of letting out for me but I do it sometimes when I have no other way of getting my feelings of hate for myself out, and it does help.