As Rodney Keene drove through the ghetto on his customary route home, he looked to his left and saw two people with Japanese-looking symbols tattooed on their bodies beating the living daylight out of each other. Rodney chuckled at the sight and continued driving home. When he got home, he turned on the television and watched the news. Rodney laughed hysterically when seeing the report on a lunatic who had shot up a school in Arkansas. He took out the videotape he had rented from Block Buster and shoved it into his VCR. Leaning back, he smiled as he watched Sylvester Stallone fill hundreds of Vietnamese soldiers with lead. Everyday people see violence, accept it, and laugh at it; violence is perfectly acceptable from guns, to the media, to drunkards.
Guns are tools of mass destruction that every American should own. Guns can reduce the population of overcrowded areas, do away with unwanted trespassers, and provide solutions for arguments. Overcrowding has always been a problem; thank God Samuel Colt invented the revolver! Guns are now the answer to overpopulation. You don't want to wait in a long line? No problem! Simply plow right through everyone with your semi-automatic. That is exactly what the students in Littleton, Colorado did. They said to themselves, "This school is too crowded with jocks and other losers, let's kill them all." They did exactly that. Look at the results; there are now less jocks and geeks in the town, and there is more meat in the cafeteria to go around.
Guns can also get rid of those random suspicious trespassers. If the silhouette of a body is seen on your lawn, immediately yell, "Get off of my property!" wait three seconds, and fire away with your trusty 12 gauge shotgun; so they look like grammar school students, so what? They should know better. And don't worry about the police; they can't do anything about it, it is your property not theirs.