Love and chemistry

            The Beatles once said "the love you take is equal to the love you make."" The energy leaving the heated part of a system is equal to the energy entering the cooler part of the system: Qcold = - Qhot. Can you find anywhere a more eloquent parallel to the fundamental law governing that mysterious concept known as love? Love is related to thermodynamics, and not simply because things tend to heat up' when that mutual attraction we call love comes into play, but because love is a valid physical force, right up there with gravity and electromagnetism. As for the proof of this revolutionary premise, its derivation is much too sophisticated for a text of this type. However, I will satiate some of your interest in my remarkable theorem, which I have ingeniously named the Theory of Love.
             The magnitude of the Love Force "which is a name I may have to change for fear of ridicule "is greater than that of gravity, yet less than that of the electromagnetic force. My reasons for this are clear: after spending time with one you love, you obtain a feeling of lightness, as if you were floating, or walking on air. Hence, love is clearly the superior to gravity. However, I have never experienced a force as strong as the time I inadvertently electrocuted myself while fixing the television. Therefore, I hold that electricity is more potent than love, at least until I get over my fear of power outlets.
             My extensive calculations suggest that there is a clear parallel between the concept of love and Heisenberg's Uncertainty Principle. Actually, this postulate comes more from my frequent failures in wooing women than any sound mathematical analysis. I advocate that the more you talk to someone you love, the less you understand what the heck they're trying to say. Unfortunately, this postulate has been repeatedly confirmed experimentally.
             Being a far-reaching and influential presumption, the Theory of Love even has applications in early 17th century British Literature.