Evaluate the evidence for men and women having different styles of communication.
Differences between men and women in conversation .
One of the most beneficial areas of research has been the studies of conversations between males and females. In brief, this research indicates that the young boy-girl interaction styles described above continue for a life-time in our male-female conversational styles. Men and women operate in two very different social worlds. Men are in an ongoing contest, competing with everyone by displaying their competence and skill. Why don't men ask for directions when lost? Because it puts them in a you-know-more-than-I-do position. Women are cautious but persistently seek intimacy; they want emotional support, cooperation, and praise. Given these different orientations, it is no wonder the sexes have trouble communicating! .
But if both sexes understand where the other is "coming from," the conflicts can be reduced. Examples: a man can gain an understanding of how his wife can love talking on and on to her female friends about a problem and never receive any advice or criticism. The women are interacting to get support, not solutions. Women can come to understand why men shift the topic to something they did and/or something they know about, rather than asking questions as a woman would (asking questions might suggest the other person knows more). Many men relish getting into lively arguments about politics, sports, or a professional issue. Like boys at play, men are establishing their place in the pecking order. They enjoy the competitive process, e.g. men like their debate opponents better afterwards; women tend to like any challenger or debater less afterwards. If we fully recognize these major differences between men and women, we can understand that the man, trying to be helpful, offers his wife a solution to the problem she is sharing; she gets mad because he seems to be assuming that he could handle the problem better than she could.