In the past few years I have learned more from my life experiences than any other time in my life. I feel like I just woke up a few years ago and started to live my life.
In 1996, pregnant with my first child, I decided to not work outside my home and raise my kids. I was certain of my decision and excited to be a stay-at-home mom. I had two more kids by the end of 1999 and my life had changed completely. My role as a wife, mother, daughter, and friend were all affected by this new life I had.
As a wife, I was sharing a new experience with my husband. One that is truly the most amazing experience ever. Kids bring a new sense of love and commitment to a marriage. They are little miracles, but they also require a lot of work, attention, and time. Having 3, very active, kids age 3 and under, was a non-stop job. It was that way for both of us, but primarily me. They brought us so much joy, so many laughs, and even many tears. At the same time, they were causing a lot of animosity between us. He was jealous that I was able to stay at home, and I just wanted some help. By the time our third child was one, our relationship had changed, we were growing apart from each other, and I was loosing myself to my marriage and my kids.
As a mother, I was truly enjoying my children, and raising them. I was also finding myself craving some adult interaction as well. When things in my marriage had changed I focused a lot of energy on making it work. During this time I leaned of my friends for support, and advice that I was not able to get from my husband.
My friendships changed also. The friends that I had before I had kids slowly drifted away. I understood why, but it was still hard to accept at first. The friends I had that had their own children suddenly became closer friends than before. There was more understanding from them on marriage and children issues. It was great to ask questions and get answers from people who were going through, or had gone through, the same things as me.